It's another late night and I can't sleep, but who needs sleep anyway? It's almost a full moon and the wind is blowing the clouds so fast that the moon is playing peek-a-boo with me. That's what my head feels like, peek-a-boo with thoughts, memories, and regrets. What ever happened to that little girl who was three and saw the world through rose colored glasses, believed in the Easter Bunny, and thought the world was fair? As I played on the swing set in our back yard, I wanted to be a trapeze artist, a nurse, or a cowboy. I never did those things in real life, only in my imagination. Now I'm too old to fly through the air, go back to school, or learn to ride a horse and shoot Indians. I don't mean any of this to be politically incorrect, you know. Remember "Bang, Bang, you're dead?" And you'd fall down and pretend to die. Then we'd ALL fall down and die laughing, throw down our stick guns and bows, and go play Red Rover. What an inhumane game to teach a child. You divide up in to two teams, wait to be called over by the other team, and then have to break the chain of hands to be accepted. Talk about rejection on top of rejection. Well, I've had my pity party and appreciate a sounding board and anyone who was kind enough to read my rantings.
Thank goodness that my grown-up God is merciful and gives me love and grace for all my thoughts and actions. I'm not sure I'd want fairness from God to me, I much prefer mercy versus justice. My God is a good ole Gal. Y'all come back now. Candace